"If he’s drunk, be submissive.", local wife is confused on what to do. BY ENIOLA OREKOYA

Culture and Civilization: Marriage
Culture can be defined simply as a people’s way of life. It is the ideas, customs and social behavior of a particular people or society.
Civilization is any complex society defined by urban development, social stratification imposed by a cultural elite symbolic system of communication and a perceived separation from and domination over the natural environment, as defined by Wikipedia.
Most times more often than not, we find that the two concepts end up clashing with one another as one element of one concept might highly negate or contradict the other. The purpose of this article is to list some contradictions and therefore explain why those contradictions don’t even need to occur, because I’m of the opinion that culture and civilization should not contradict each other but yet they should compliment each other.
Some time ago, A lady tweeted on twitter saying “I will never kneel for my husband on my wedding day” some found it offensive whilst some supported and like in all arguments, there were the neutrals. Kneeling to feed the man in nigerian weddings is a part of culture in majority of the ethnic groups in Nigeria.
However, some interpret this act as acknowledging the husband being the master and the wife being the slave. This interpretation falls under the guises of civilization. A person who has been exposed to different parts of the world sees it belittling to kneel before anyone especially the man she is to be wedded to.
Another perspective of the given scenario is when a woman kneels and declares that her husband is now the master and controller of her life, and she therefore has no say as to what goes on in her life. So if he says “lick my shoe, she would lick his shoe”(this being a metaphor). She does this because this is what she has been taught to do by her mother and they, by their own mothers. Be submissive without wisdom. Even if the man is wrong, be submissive, if he’s drunk, be submissive, if he’s not in a proper state to make decisions, be submissive and  if he’s violent, be submissive. The woman has been taught to only obey authority without questioning which in some cases can lead to destruction or even death.
However, another view of this scenario is completely acknowledging to the husband saying “I am yours and you are mine, we are now in a lifelong partnership where you would serve as a head of the family as every institution needs a head, and I have chosen you to be that head of the family we both intend to start. A head who oversees and directs to wisdom, not controls” because like we said earlier on, it’s a partnership where a head has been set aside. The latter example is a way that shows culture and civilization being combined in such a way that no party feels underrated and unimportant. However the first example occurs when civilization takes precedence over culture. The 2nd example occurs when culture takes precedence over civilization.
But we notice that the 3rd example occurs when there’s a balance between the two concepts.
We must be civilized because it is the only way to move forward as a people but we must also never forget culture, because that’s all we got! It's our identity.